Warning, old fart pondering!

For years now I've made it my habit to watch people, to pay attention to how and what we say, do and ignore about those that pass us by, cling to us and get invited in. I've always thought I was pretty aware too.

Yeah, right...

It's amazing how your perspective changes when it's all you can do to struggle for the next breath, when it takes all you have to even hope there might be another day.

It's an awakening I don't wish on anyone...

But even in the midst of the muck I saw so many who choose to wallow in it. Not caring if they ever find a way out.

I wonder about where I found strength, how it came, who I have to thank... and I have to remember all those who chose to be ignorant. Am I bitter? No, just a little more cynical... a little less trusting... and more hopes have died...